protective_logic | GFH IC Contact

You were 'sleeping' at Lou's place before you were involved. And I sleep on his couch when we're done drinking so I don't drunkenly spew our address out, Omega. I'm trying to be RESPONSIBLE here.

I'm not dating him. We're friends. And if you're not satisfied with it, then suck it up and deal. I get this. I get to have this ONE person in my life who is no pressure. Who just wants to sit around and what terrible old Bruce Willis movies and complain about stupid shit with. I don't HAVE any friends other than York, so I get to have this ONE person.

Right, because going out and getting drunk with strangers is so responsible! Because York is such a great friend. So helpful now that you're disappearing off with some sort of fugitive, for all we know, escaped convict! I'm starting to think you were safer never leaving the goddamn house!

And don't ever mention her to me again. You got that? I'm not saying it twice.

York doesn't make me hate myself every time I try to do something FOR myself.

I don't go disappearing off. I always plan my excursions and tell you where I'm going. But if that is too much for you, then fine. Since my safety is SO important to you, you have it.

Funny. York makes me hate myself, you, and Sigma every time he opens his fucking mouth.

I am trying to keep you from imploding! How am I the bad guy? You're the one dashing off to self destruction and alcoholism! Did you ever talk to Dr. Grey or did you go have another drink with your little buddy?

I'm not drinking, Omega. And he keeps me from imploding by being a friend. By being supportive. A thing you still haven't learned how to do. But clearly the answer to this is just to listen to what you want.

I won't talk to TC anymore. I won't have a drink every now and then to dull the pain despite my older brother having a standing arrangement to drink with Tex on the weekends where she's free and Epsilon enjoys bars.

I'll stay at home except when I have to go to work or grocery shop or take care of the kids. Not like I have much use for a social life anymore. Guess you were wrong, a few months back, in saying I should get out more. Clearly that was all kinds of a mistake.

We are not "dulling the pain" and you are dodging the question with wild hyperbole!

Did. You. See. A. Doctor?

Yes. I am perfectly healthy beyond a lack of appetite that has been chalked up to depression.

So what, you're going to hide in the house and drink yourself into an early grave?

I told you, I won't be drinking more. I will, as you desire, stay at home when I'm not working. Your wish is my command.

I just have to ask one thing, Omega. Did I ruin your happy little fantasy of what life with Maine would be like? Did you just want me with him so you could play house with the brother you want rather than the brother you have? What was Maine going to do for you, once he moved into our home to be our newest and bestest brother? Take the weight off your shoulders? Be the one responsible for things? How much did I hurt you by destroying your hope for a better life? Because he's the ONLY social interaction you've ever approved of me having. Was I a means to the end of you having your own big brother?

I never said I wanted you to stay home! Don't twist my words around like that!

And no, you fool, it wasn't like that and you damn well know that. He was going to keep you from going over the cliff, because fuck if I know how to stop you and you're not even trying!

He was the cliff, Omega. One you were right to want to keep me away from at the start. But you only ended up facilitating my run for it. Now...

Now I make a friend and that pisses you off. I'm TRYING. I'm trying really fucking hard and having this friend is helping. But because you can't trust me, I'll drop it. As your majesty desires.

Excuse me. I go to enact this edict. Oh, but to remember that I'm not allowed friends, I should first go sit down and write, shouldn't I? What would be appropriate? 'I shall not have friends' a hundred times?

No! Of course not D, I swear, I oughtta ~~strangle~~ hug you for that, what the fuck is wrong with your brain?

Look. His background check came back clean? Florida said he's okay? Because I do trust you. I don't trust strange men popping up out of nowhere.

Edited 2015-12-06 02:44 (UTC)

He didn't pop out of nowhere, and you accused me of dating, of SLEEPING WITH a murderer. You made it clear you don't want me near him. Make up your fucking mind, because part of what is wrong with MY brain is your refusal to ever say what you mean. To be here for me when I need it. Hell, I couldn't even TALK to you about the problem with Maine before everything happened because you didn't want to fucking LISTEN to me anymore.

I was at the store. He had a cookbook and he was clueless. I helped him find a recipe and ingredients so he could impress a guy he has a VERY clear crush on. I talked to him a bit after, but mostly he was someone who didn't know Maine, and that was why I wanted to drink with him. So someone would put me in a cab and I wouldn't be alone while I was hurting. Because I couldn't drink with you.

So I'm sorry you're jealous. I won't be around him again. Because I'm not ALLOWED to heal.

There is so much wrong with that I don't even know where to start. I'm going for a walk and if I ever come home, we're going to talk.

And in the meantime stop fucking blaming me for everything you regret!

If you never come home, then you're just like everyone else who was supposed to care about me in my life, so I won't be surprised.

Oh, and stop attacking me every time I find a good thing to try and hold to.

Do you dump so much shit on me because you know I won't leave?

Fine. If you trust the guy, at least you're not alone. Call if you're in trouble.

And take some fucking responsibility for once!

I ruined my life, Omega. But you refused to listen when I needed to talk to you. You acted like my feelings were a burden. So don't ignore that you didn't take your chance to help.

Leave me alone with my grief. It's mine and only mine. I won't let it affect the family. I swear that. Family is the only thing I have left.

I did -when did I refuse to listen? Is this the thing where you read my mind and decided that I didn't want to or what?

And I thought you had your terrorist, unless you're using me as an excuse to implode that too, because God forbid you have a friend. Can I at least hope York's days are numbered too?

I'm sorry. I just...

I smile with him, Omega. I'm pretty sure he wants to sleep with me, I don't want to sleep with him. I just... When I'm around him I'm not lonely. It doesn't hurt as much. I can let myself be mad at Maine for not wanting me when this man clearly does, instead of loathing myself for giving up the one good thing in my life. The chance I had at happiness.

Why... why you had to attack that I don't know. Maybe you're just upset over Delta's relationship with this Squall character. If it's that bad for you I can forbid him from the teen. If you're that worried about TC I can just not see him anymore. Just tell me what you want.

Because, honestly, you're impossible to understand and I should clearly not be left in charge of decisions anymore.

I want you and the kids to be happy and safe. That's all. Florida made it sound like this guy's bad news. But I do trust you more than him. So you make your own decisions. Just...stop acting like I have all this power over you. Please.

Florida hates me for what I did to Maine. This isn't the first way he's tried to hurt me over it.

And... Omega, it's not an act. If you're really that concerned over him, I will stop seeing him. It's as simple as that.

I trust you. I'd like to meet him. But I trust you.

You shouldn't meet him.

...why not?

Despite everything I've told him and how many times I've yelled at him about it, he has come to the conclusion that he doesn't like you. It's unfair of him, it's stupid, and it doesn't matter that I call it bullshit when he gets annoyed or angry.

He said if he ever met you, he'd punch you.

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He's super jealous. In case you missed that.

Jealous because D has a friend?

Because Nida does for Theta what Omega doesn't

And so D has to be punished.

Omega is not the core of rationality and fairness

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Is Delta trying to get Omega to put a hole in the wall?

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Very quiet. Very angry.

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Half an hour later

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