protective_logic (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
protective_logic) wrote2015-06-06 12:41 pm
protective_logic) wrote2015-06-06 12:41 pm
Entry tags:
Journal Entry [0016]
I suppose the best way to explain the lack of entries is 'surgery.' And then 'lack of lucidity.'
There are pieces all around me of what the last week has been. I don't know what to make of them.
-A shoddily started scarf: clearly at some point I tried yarn work. I remember being warm while I did so. I wonder.
-A brownie pan in the kitchen dish drainer: Maine must have been over. He makes brownies when I'm upset. I can tell it was him because there is a half-used bottle of caramel sauce in the fridge. He is so kind to me. I also need to let Gamma know he can't slack on putting dishes away now that I'm lucid.
-Crayon drawings of Omegaman and Golden Rose: The twins both made one design for each of these super heroes. I don't know why. They told me that it was my idea and I'm going to make costumes for Beta and Omega. I... don't know why.
-Box of chocolates with a pink bow: My suspicion on this one is Roxy. She seems to have an abundance of pink around her, so it makes sense, right?
-One sign reading 'Cold bean juice and your morning fuzzy pill': It's Omega's handwriting, by an empty coffee mug, perhaps from the morning. The mug smells like coffee. I must assume that someone, quite possibly myself, came up with the brilliant idea of calling coffee 'bean juice.' What a pity.
That's really all I have to itemize from the strangeness of my week. But then, as lucidity approaches, an interesting question. How do I react to this whole Omega having his own room thing? Part of my head is screaming that he's finally doing it, finally leaving. I think I hate that part of my head now. I refuse to believe anything it says any longer. Omega was there when I went in. I know Omega was there when I left. I am CERTAIN Omega was helping take care of me. Maybe we're not the greatest at being brothers, but I think it's me that is part of the problem, and I hereby resolve to change.
If he needs the space, then he needs the space. It might make our fights (which I hope to be less frequent) better. It will allow him a place to be before and after jobs if he's a mess. We won't want the littles seeing him 'hurt' when it's just blood from helping someone if something goes, what is the way to put it, sideways? And we definitely don't want his merc gear or medical supplies or a gun in the house.
Actually... a gun might not be a bad idea. I should talk to Texas and Omega about this. With two mercenaries in the family and two more of us dating mercs, it is possible that the best idea is to get a gunsafe. We can put it on the high shelf in the closet that Theta can't reach even if he climbs on a chair, but the rest of us can get to. We'll make the code something us elder siblings know, and I'll talk to Tex and Omega about helping us learn to shoot just enough for self defense. Of course if it's for self-defense then maybe downstairs by the door is a bad idea. Okay, new idea. Make a plan with Tex and Omega about what to do in emergencies. Perhaps see if they know something about maybe making hidey holes for the littles to crawl into if something bad happens and we give them a special word or something.
Chances are we'll never have to use it, but given how our lives are changing? Far better safe than sorry.
Other thought: Talk to York. He's supposed to be good at security stuff. He might be able to help us set up an alarm system or something.
There are pieces all around me of what the last week has been. I don't know what to make of them.
-A shoddily started scarf: clearly at some point I tried yarn work. I remember being warm while I did so. I wonder.
-A brownie pan in the kitchen dish drainer: Maine must have been over. He makes brownies when I'm upset. I can tell it was him because there is a half-used bottle of caramel sauce in the fridge. He is so kind to me. I also need to let Gamma know he can't slack on putting dishes away now that I'm lucid.
-Crayon drawings of Omegaman and Golden Rose: The twins both made one design for each of these super heroes. I don't know why. They told me that it was my idea and I'm going to make costumes for Beta and Omega. I... don't know why.
-Box of chocolates with a pink bow: My suspicion on this one is Roxy. She seems to have an abundance of pink around her, so it makes sense, right?
-One sign reading 'Cold bean juice and your morning fuzzy pill': It's Omega's handwriting, by an empty coffee mug, perhaps from the morning. The mug smells like coffee. I must assume that someone, quite possibly myself, came up with the brilliant idea of calling coffee 'bean juice.' What a pity.
That's really all I have to itemize from the strangeness of my week. But then, as lucidity approaches, an interesting question. How do I react to this whole Omega having his own room thing? Part of my head is screaming that he's finally doing it, finally leaving. I think I hate that part of my head now. I refuse to believe anything it says any longer. Omega was there when I went in. I know Omega was there when I left. I am CERTAIN Omega was helping take care of me. Maybe we're not the greatest at being brothers, but I think it's me that is part of the problem, and I hereby resolve to change.
If he needs the space, then he needs the space. It might make our fights (which I hope to be less frequent) better. It will allow him a place to be before and after jobs if he's a mess. We won't want the littles seeing him 'hurt' when it's just blood from helping someone if something goes, what is the way to put it, sideways? And we definitely don't want his merc gear or medical supplies or a gun in the house.
Actually... a gun might not be a bad idea. I should talk to Texas and Omega about this. With two mercenaries in the family and two more of us dating mercs, it is possible that the best idea is to get a gunsafe. We can put it on the high shelf in the closet that Theta can't reach even if he climbs on a chair, but the rest of us can get to. We'll make the code something us elder siblings know, and I'll talk to Tex and Omega about helping us learn to shoot just enough for self defense. Of course if it's for self-defense then maybe downstairs by the door is a bad idea. Okay, new idea. Make a plan with Tex and Omega about what to do in emergencies. Perhaps see if they know something about maybe making hidey holes for the littles to crawl into if something bad happens and we give them a special word or something.
Chances are we'll never have to use it, but given how our lives are changing? Far better safe than sorry.
Other thought: Talk to York. He's supposed to be good at security stuff. He might be able to help us set up an alarm system or something.